The Nanny Chronicles

The image of the brown woman as care provider of white children is one that permeates in TV and film, from Hattie McDonald as Mammy in "Gone with the Wind" to Viola Davis as Aibileen Clark in "The Help". Commonly this narrative is secondary to that of a white protagonist. These brown women are merely part of the mis-en-scene or used a convenient plot tools. Rarely is the narrative deeply explored in the viewpoint of these women, instead, what is the perspective of white, attractive, young nannies, like Fran Fine in “The Nanny", Kimmy Schmidt and of course, Mary Poppins.  These young women are portrayed as magically competent in childcare after a minor blunders, and these narratives often gloss over the complexities and intricacies of child care, especially in terms of race, class, and gender. Taking a casual glance throughout the streets of Tribeca and the Upper East Side, it's brown women you see pushing around strollers with tiny white faces peering above. There is a certain strange internal dichotomy to being a nanny as someone of color, temporarily shifting your class environment yet constantly being reminded of who and what you are.  These women are often immigrants hailing from various countries around the world, they are the unsung heroes of New York, doing the difficult work that is child care while society demeans this occupation as undignified. 

My project is called "The Nanny Chronicles" a series of vignettes in which I interview different people of various ethnicities to recount their worst experiences working as nannies. The style of the videos is similar to that of the popular series “Drunk History” in which people recount historic events and professional actor act them out. Of course, no one is actually inebriated in this series. The series presents horrific, terrifying and perplexing situations in a humorous light. I chose this route because I believe that humor is the quickest way to educate, humor is easily spread, and especially with something as niche and marginalized as childcare, sometimes all you can do is laugh at the horror. The first in the series is my own story which I have previously shared in class, about one of the children uttering out the N-word and my struggle on how to act. My plan for this serious is to move it forward and hopefully give a voice to those who have been misrepresented.

Citations

Parreñas, Rhacel Salazar. Servants of globalization: Women, migration and domestic work. Stanford University Press, 2001.

Final Project Children's Book: AH MEI.

There are so many things I wanted to include in this book. I wanted characters of color, with different talents that break race and gender stereotypes, I wanted to write a story which people could relate to, one with a lesson everyone could apply to their lives and help make the world a better place. However, after four weeks into this project, I realized that I couldn't connect to my story, that everything felt forced and untrue, and that the diverse cast of characters need more development and didn't drive the plot. Instead they were disposable pawns with which I attempted to make strong points (storytelling can be a talent, don't assume things about person based solely upon the color of their skin, educatIon and literacy for young girls is important) in a not-so-strong way. I knew I couldn't finish the story - the skeleton of the book - by my deadline, so last week, I asked my mom if she knew any empowering stories for young girls that she knew of, besides Mulan. And so she told me about her story. 

After translating her story, I looked back to books I loved reading when I was little, and tried to find a writing and illustration style I wanted to emulate. The Madeline series by Ludwig Bemelmans and Matilda by Roald Dahl struck my attention, and I knew I wanted to have a title and style similar to both books. 

I emulated the rhyme style and landscape illustration from Madeline

Inspired by Roald Dahl's hand drawn illustrations, my story and his elicit a laid back fee

Hyao Miyazaki's illustrations are very peaceful and simple

Thus AH MEI was born. The style of hand drawn illustrations are taken from both books, the and the rhyming style is taken from Madeleine. In the title, Mei is my mom’s Chinese name, as well as English, and her parents called her AH MEI. After interviewing my mother, I spent my time rereading empowering books from my childhood; figuring out how to make the story rhyme , and finally laying it all out. 

AH MEI follows the life of my mother in her mid twenties. She didn't enjoy her daily toilings under a blazing sun as a construction worker, but one day her life perspective, and the perspective of the people to whom she shared a story which she had read, changed after she read a particular book. It was a story of a man, exempt from being drafted in a war between China and Vietnam since his father was a general, who had died in war because his father forced him to fight for their country. From this story, Mei and others learned that no job is more important than another, because if no one is willing to do a job, who will? They also learned that life is short and that peace of mind is a gift. This book boils down these lessons simple enough for children to learn from,  and for adults to interpret. Additionally, it includes elements from my previous goal and more: emphasizing the importance of women's literacy, female agency, critical thinking, and leadership, introduces colors and universally familiar objects, that women can do the things usually men do, and the idea that diligence pays off. More importantly, this is a book I can connect with, as well as something that can remind me of my mother for the years to come.

Link to digital book: http://www.yumpu.com/s/Do2My1r1e8qWLn6p

Body Image Workshop

For my final project, I started compiling interviews, to eventually develop a curriculum for intermediate, middle, and high school aged students about body image. Additionally, I investigated the effects of body image on women from varying classes, races, cultures and socioeconomic backgrounds to discover universal truths, as well as differences, about the female body in American Culture. I used a group of women from my theater company and asked them to put them selves on tape with the following questions as guild line. I created questions based on reads to provoke answers based in experience:

1. At what age did you realize that, culturally, you are viewed as a "women"?
2. What does it mean to be a women?
3. What does it mean to be a women in American Culture?
4. What is your definition of body image?
5. At what age did you come to understand body image and what did that mean for you?
6. How does your race play into your understanding of your body?
7. How does your sexual orientation play into your understanding your body?
8. How does your socioeconomic class play into your understanding your body?
9. How does your education play into understanding you body?
10. Do you see body image as an issue? If so, do you see body image as a universal issue or one bound to an environment?
11. What is your definition of an eating disorder?
12. Who do you think is affected by eating disorders? Why?
13. Do you feel physically represented in the media? If so, where in the media (TV, Film, Advertising, music videos, etc.) do you see your self most represented?
14. Do you think the media plays a part in how we define our bodies?
15. How has your relationship with your body changed over time?
16. If you could tell your younger self one thing about everything you just discussed, what would it be?

I then began to compile the responses in a video. Additionally, I created a video about this project beyond these immediate videos and reflected on it all through creative writing. As I continue to explore these truths, I plan to develop a curriculum for younger girls. 

For materials and more information check out my website.

Bell Hooks, Understanding Patriarchy 2004
Bell Hooks, The Oppositional Gaze 1992
Laura Mulvey, Visual Pleasure 1975
Jean Killbourne, The More You Subtract
Laurie Penny, Unspeakable Things 2014

What If?

I have always been intrigued by how diverse we attempt to represent ourselves. What does our outward image reveal? What do we choose to wear or not wear? and are we making this decision consciously or is it an accumulation of acquired ideologies from society and media? The claim that you are free to wear what you please, has always triggered a cringe-worthy response from me. Sure, I always had an opportunity to pick and choose what I wanted to wear, but that decision was shackled with predetermined factors including religion, reputation, family, politics.

Even before I came to the United States, there was the lingering anxiety of wearing the Hijab in public after the events of 9/11. I heard through media outlets about the harassment Muslim females were receiving in different states, from having their headscarf pulled off, being labeled and called a terrorist, to being shot and killed. Five years later, and that same fear still lingers. The rhetoric and propaganda about Islam continues - women who choose to wear their religion publicly, are the ones who suffer the most (double trouble if you choose to wear a hijab and are a woman of color).

With all the issues we discussed in class, involving entertainment media in general, including objectification, misrepresentation, lack of diversity/authority/agency, and even policing of women’s bodies, I continued developing a critical eye not only to the society that I currently live in, but that which I came from and had spent the majority of my childhood. The timing of this class happened to align with my journey on self-discovery and identity. As I graduate and go out to the “real-world,” I ask myself: do I want to continue wearing a representation of my faith? How much of an impact, if any, would my decision make? Why should I be concerned with external factors, when the journey is more spiritual and intimate and should involve looking inward. These questions and more have inspired the short film I produced/wrote to present as a final for this class. I hope to continue documenting the choices I make as continue on this journey.

Sources:

Awad, Amal. "Taking off the Hijab." Daily Life. Daily Life, 16 July 2012. Web. 12 Dec. 2015.

Robbins, Liz. "Do You Know Me? Do You Know My Heart?" New York Times. The New York Times Company, 10 Dec. 2015. Web.

Zughaib, Helen. "Changing Perceptions." Changing Perceptions. International Museum of Women, 12 July 2015. Web. 12 Dec. 2015.

Primo, Valentina. "Are Egypt's Women Taking off Their Veils?" Cairo Scene. MO4 Network, 8 Sept. 2015. Web. 12 Dec. 2015.

Day in the Life - A Web Game

In the world of video games and game development, there very much exists a "boys club" mentality. Recent events such as #GamerGate and people losing their jobs over jokes about dongles underscore that not only does a culture of ignorance pervade throughout the industry, but also blind intolerance in the name of "political correctness." I present a game about a day in the life of a newly hired game developer. As this rookie hire, you will face the trials and tribulations present in the first day on the job, and depending on your path may or may not encounter ignorance and/or intolerance. Think of it like a "choose-your-own-adventure" story with more active interactivity and more immediate feedback about your choice, or lack thereof. The game is open, made in Twine, lives on GitHub, and you can play it here!

AYO: A SKATE ZINE

I always wanted to learn how to skateboard growing up, but I was too scared to try. I assumed that skateboarding was for boys, more specifically white boys and I as a black girl had no business on a skateboard; an idea that followed me all the way till college. Around the age of 19, I started hanging out with skaters and absorbing their culture, but merely as an observer, because that was my role as a woman. All aesthetics, no action. I was just another girl on the sideline, letting the guys skate. Typically left to watch their stuff. Eventually I got fed up with being a guest, and when a neighbor gave me her son’s old board I decided that I would try to learn to skate, and find other girls to skate with me.

“Self-determination - the decision to define ourselves, name ourselves, and speak for ourselves, in stead of being defined and spoken for by others.”
Audrey Lorde, Sister Outsider. 

 AYO is a monthly zine dedicated to encouraging women of color to skate as a mean of liberation. Not only is skateboarding a fun pastime, it's a symbolic gesture of overcoming oppression. When you skate you feel free, the physical act of it is liberating. It gives women agency, allowing them to conquer something they are told they can not do. And skateboarding is accessible, you can take a skateboard anywhere and use it anywhere. Using DIY tactics from the riot grrrl movement, AYO is reclaiming skate culture and creating a space for females with in it. It not only introduces girls to the basics of skating, it also introduces them to the basics of feminism.

Mission Statement: Your skateboard is a weapon.  

Sources:

Hooks, Bell. The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love. New York: Atria, 2004. Print.

Lorde, Audre. Sister Outsider: Essays and Speeches. Berkeley, CA: Crossing, 2007. Print.

Final Project: #ArmoredFems

After being attacked by a man in my own building during the course of this semester and successfully fighting him off I was exhausted. I was exhausted, not only physically but mentally. My issue with the attack was when I called the cops there was no aid provided and I was left feeling unsafe. I turned to the media to expose what had happened to me, after seeing the support my friends and peers provided me it restored some peace of mind. I wanted to provide this for others as well as provide media which fought against rape culture which is so harmful to us. I relived that night many times, through conversations and interactions. My attacker is still out there, and no justice has been brought but through sharing my story, and hearing other's stories I have been able to conquer that night.

What inspired the name

ArmoredFems is a project I want to work on until I'm able to make it into an overall project perhaps even a publication.I came up with the name after I saw Rihanna's gun tattoo. I wanted a name which empowered while also focused on the way which feminine bodies are at risk every day. Armored fems is just that. As a queer afro-latino I understood that when my attacker saw me dressed androgynously and saw my body he placed a stereotype on me. He assumed I was weak just because of his association with the feminine. I want to dispel this notion that femininity is weak which is present in society as well as very present in the gay community. I wear my femininity with pride and I want to encourage that.

At first I seeked out to create a space in which I could discuss how to combat rapist physically. I felt like the issue was that I was not prepared. Then I thought longer and realized I was blaming myself, and I wasn't addressing the issue directly. I shouldn't have to be a karate king to defend myself, it shouldn't be something society requires. I wanted to provide media which seeked to educate and perhaps influence someone to change their ways. I wanted to do it in a way which people would approach it comfortable yet understand the severity while also providing fashion blogging, reviews and news.

Work by Anastasia Lovera Titled "The Proof is Here"

Armored Fems on instagram is meant to be digestible knowledge which can be revisited later (which is why I provide links for many of the things I discuss). It is meant to be aesthetically pleasing while also informing my followers about what's going on in the feminist world. Armored Fems the blog is meant to be a place of inspiration and original content. On it I hope to provide works that have gone through a feminist filter and deal with a social issue or presents some type of change. Right now I have original works up they range from personal narratives to academic essays from peers who feel like sharing their work. I've always been a fan of essays, and for those who are looking for wholesome pieces really dealing with issues they can find them here.

This winter I have scheduled a "feminist kiki" which is basically a space in which we will surround ourselves with feminist media. I want it to be a dress up party and really encourage my guest to dress as their feminist icons and we can discuss it all. I hope to see lots of different characters and really have a fun time while creating an environment which is safe for everyone. I am also working with some artist, such as Anastasia Lovera to work on a logo since her works focus on the feminine, since it's so important to uphold femininity in our patriarchy.

A big project which I had hope to have accomplished by now is the shoot "What's Your Armor?" I want to represent different feminine bodies, and due to scheduling problems and vacations I wasn't able to do so. I will have a personal video of me preparing for my night out and discussing how what I wear and the choices I make are more difficult than that of a cis white man. I want to provide a juxtaposition with one of my white cis male peers. This should be up before Christmas if my cinematographer is back in time.

If you're interested in sharing your work or being a part of it please contact me at ArmoredFems@gmail.com